Yoni is the Sanskrit word for the vagina that is loosely translated as "sacred
or "Sacred Temple." In Tantra, the
Yoni is seen from a perspective
of love and respect. This is particularly important for men to learn.
Before beginning the Yoni Massage it is
important to create a space for the woman (the receiver) in which to relax,
from which she can more easily enter a state of high arousal and experience
great pleasure from her Yoni. Her partner
(the giver) will experience the joy of giving pleasure and witnessing a
special moment. The Yoni Massage can also be used as a form of "safe
sex" and is an excellent activity to build trust and intimacy. Some massage and
sex therapists use it to assist women to break through sexual blocks or
The goal of the Yoni massage is not solely to
achieve orgasm, although orgasm is often a pleasant and welcome side effect.
The goal can be as simple as to pleasure and massage the Yoni. From this
perspective both receiver and giver can relax, and do not have to worry about
achieving any particular goal. When orgasm does occur it is usually more
expanded, more intense and more satisfying. It is also helpful for the giver
to not expect anything in return, but simply allow the receiver to enjoy the
massage and to relax into herself.
Have the receiver lie on her back with pillows under
her head so she can look down at her genitals and up at her partner (giver).
Place a pillow, covered with a towel, under her hips. Her legs are to be
spread apart with the knees slightly bent (pillows or cushions under the knees
will also help) and her genitals clearly exposed for the massage.
This position allows full access to the Yoni and other parts of the
body. Before contacting the body, begin with deep, relaxed breathing. Both
giver and receiver should remember to breathe deeply, slowly and with
relaxation during the entire process. The giver will gently remind the
receiver to start breathing again if the receiver stops or begins to take
shallower breaths. Deep breathing, not hyperventilating, is most important.
Gently massage the legs, abdomen, thighs, breasts,
etc., to encourage the receiver to relax and for the giver to prepare for
touching her Yoni. Pour a small quantity of a high-quality oil or
lubricant on the mound of the Yoni. Pour just enough so that it drips
down the outer lips and covers the outside of the Yoni. Begin gently massaging the mound and outer lips of
the Yoni. Spend time here and do not rush. Relax and enjoy giving the
Gently squeeze the outer lip between the thumb and index finger, and
slide up and down the entire length of each lip. Do the same to the
inner lips of the Yoni/vagina. Take your time. It is helpful for giver and receiver
to look into each other's eyes as much as possible. The receiver should tell
the giver if the pressure, speed, depth, etc. need to be increased or
decreased. Limit your conversation and focus on the pleasurable sensation, too
much talking will diminish the effect.
The Crown Jewel
The clitoris is an amazingly complex structure,
similar in function to the male's glans, but surprisingly - up to four
times more sensitive. The glans portion of the clitoris holds 6,000 - 8,000
sensory nerve endings, more than any other structure in the human body.
This hypersensitive node has only one purpose: pleasure. Nothing
exceeds its ability to receive and transmit sensations of touch, pressure or
vibration. The glans are the "crown jewel" of the clitoral system!
Stroke the clitoris with clockwise and
counter-clockwise circles. Gently squeeze it between thumb and index fingers.
Do this as a massage and not to get the receiver off. The receiver will
undoubtedly become very aroused but continue to encourage her to relax and
Slowly and with great care, insert the middle finger
of your right hand into the Yoni (there is a reason for using the right
hand as opposed to the left. It has to do with polarity in Tantra).
gently explore and massage the inside of the Yoni with this finger.
Take your time, be gentle, and feel up, down and sideways. Vary the depth,
speed and pressure. It is important to remember that this is a massage in
which you are nurturing and relaxing the Yoni. With your palm facing
up, and the middle finger inside the Yoni, move the middle finger in a
"come here" gesture or crook back towards the palm. You will contact a spongy
area of tissue just under the pubic bone, behind the clitoris. This is the
G-spot or in Tantra, "the sacred spot". She may feel the need
to urinate, experience a little discomfort or most hopefully pleasure. Vary the
pressure, speed and pattern of movement. You can move side to side, back and
forth, or in circles with your middle finger. You can also insert the finger
that's between your middle finger and pinky.
Most women should have no problem and will enjoy the
increased stimulation from two fingers. Take your time and be very gentle.
may use the thumb of the right hand to stimulate the clitoris as well. An
option to try if the receiver wants it is to insert the pinky of the right
hand into her anus. [In Tantra, it is said that when your pinky is gently
massaging her anus,
the next finger and middle finger in her Yoni and your thumb on her
clitoris, "You are holding one of the mysteries of the universe in your
You can use your left hand to massage her breasts,
abdomen, or clitoris. If you massage the clitoris it's usually best to use the
thumb in an up down motion, with the rest of the hand resting on, and
massaging the mound. The dual stimulation of right and left hands will provide
much pleasure for the receiver. Continue massaging, using varying speed,
pressure and motion, all the while continuing to breathe deeply and looking
into each other's eyes. She may have powerful emotions come up and may cry.
Just keep breathing and be gentle. Some women have been sexually abused and
need to be healed. A giving, loving and patient partner can be of immeasurable value to her. If she has an orgasm, keep her breathing, and
continue massaging if she wants. More orgasms may occur, each gaining in
intensity. In Tantra this is called "riding the wave."
In ending the massage, slowly, gently, and with
respect, remove your hands. Allow her to relax and enjoy the afterglow of the
Yoni massage. Cuddling or holding is very soothing as well. As you
learn to master the Yoni Massage your sex life will be greatly enriched
and you will learn a great deal about feminine sexuality.